Wednesday, January 1, 2014

2014 The Year of Surrender

"O unbelieving generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me." .... Mark 9:19

O unbelieving generation, Jesus said...

O unbelieving generation

O unbelieving woman

As I stood tall on the second row this Sunday, the smooth wood of the pew beneath my clinched fingers, I looked up as the towering ceiling seemed never to end and the stain glassed light beamed down on the alter.  Behind me, together, voices sang in a slow low tone the familiar words, "all to Jesus I surrender", as if our emaciated souls were being dragged to the cross, starving and unable to run.

Why!?!  Why aren't we running to the alter.

O unbelieving woman

Why do I stand paralyzed in the front of the sanctuary and I don't run to my Jesus, arms open, tears flowing?!

O unbelieving woman

Why don't I come to you abandoned and free, instead of paralyzed with shame and pride.

O unbelieving woman

O Jesus, wake me up,  stand me up, and with my hands up, truly, then I can surrender all!!!!!!

Stir within this unbelieving woman.  Stir within me.  Set the spark in my heart afire.... send it forth Lord.

For 2014, all to you I do surrender, God.  I am not sure what that looks like; in the same breath I breath in fear and excitement, but my hope lies in you.

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